'Div waltzes for the judges

Dock Boy decided not to participate in the Port Isabel Lighted Boat Parade.

It was not because he found any fault with his idea to rig his little 8’ trolling motor powered Avon dink with electric lights and then string together a couple of long extension cords, motor out to the judging area and turn a figure eight. He had this all worked out in his mind, right down to the free meals.

No, rather it was due to the ongoing feud between Dock Boy and Don, the property owner on the west side of the docks. Last week things erupted, resulting in the USCG and the ‘possum cops showing up, issuing Dock Boy citations and ultimatums for not having current boat registration or clear ownership.

This sent Dock Boy into a rage.

Up and down the docks he fumed, face beet red, stomping and pacing, hurling repeated curses and epitaphs, threatening to go postal on whoever he perceived culpable for this dastardly persecution against him and his beloved vessel, Sea Lyin’ , his tirade interrupted only by the occasional quoooosh of another tall boy can being opened.

In the end, after his wrath subsided, he decided not to vacate but instead vowed to untangle the convoluted trail of liens and debts and mysterious previous owners that the boat has in order to continue to stay. So for the time being it appears that some sort of unholy impasse has been reached, and Dock Boy et al will remain like the perennial barnacles and oysters that encrust the ancient deteriorating pilings of Anchor Marina.

The smell of charcoal barbeque wafted over ‘Divs deck Friday evening as I continued to string lights from the mizzen mast and foretriangle. Dock Boy was no longer concerned with the free meal tickets that the Boat Parade offered. The evening was placid, but petulant in anticipation of building winds the following day, a harbinger of another cold front due early in the coming week.

Saturday the winds arrived well before I got up at 0430 to help with the barbeque fundraiser for the Folklorico dancers. When I had left the County Christmas Party at midnight the night before, some three sheets to the wind, I noticed that it was starting to pipe up, and now as I sweated and strained to help move the gargantuan barbeque pit, the force four breeze rapidly dried the toxic rum sweat emanating from every pore.

Mid morning, the winds continued to build as I checked out the final details for Olivia’s participation. The generator seemed to handle the load just fine, a little bogged down, but what did I expect? 25 strings of lights, candy canes, snowflakes and other electrical loads. This could eat up the tiny 1200 watts ‘Divs genset produces pretty rapidly. Eventually satisfied that all was well, I rigged up the wind scoop and went below, taking a groovy 10 minute nap.

By 1600 at the skippers meeting the NWS forecast issued a wind advisory with gusts over 40mph. Great. Just what we needed. The commander called and said that his crew had some concerns regarding the conditions, but I downplayed things because Santa and his helper had already canceled thinking that the conditions were just too windy. And I needed crew. I told him the wind was already backing off as I glanced nervously at the flags which looked like they were about ready to rip off of the poles.

Back at the boat, I started the engine and genset, switching to onboard power as the sun began to be blown down out of the sky by the howling wind and the viejitos started showing up. Soon both crews arrived as well and before long our dance card was up.

"Olivia, parade one.....you're up!"

"Roger parade one, I just gotta get my dock lines untied" I radioed back.

Untying the mooring lines and exiting the slip, a violent wind gust caught our bow shoving us west, and we had to turn a circle in order to find the stage to the east. We turned the figure eight to cheers from both sides of the harbor, joined the other boats and were chugging outbound past houses full of revelers, all cheering, drinking, camera flashes popping.

A short wait by Pirates Landing as the boats unable to come into the fingers were judged, and we were off through the black and windy night to the swing bridge and Southpoint where throngs of other well-wishers cheered and partied.

Back out through the swing bridge and under the causeway, bound for the treacherous Thompkins channel, along the island.

We managed about 2/3 of the channel to Louies without incident, but ran aground pretty seriously in a poorly marked section. Thanks to Olivia’s 30 horse iron heart we were able to eventually wiggle off and join the parade, all waiting for us, to the cheers and hoots of the spectators on shore.

Past Louies, it seemed as though there were literally thousands of people all cheering and hollering. Just as we completed the loop and started heading back up Thompkins Channel, the genset, now out of fuel, sputtered and died and that was the end of the lighted portion of the boat parade for Olivia.

The Coast Guard, thinking that we might be having some sort of other problem pulled in back of us, blue cop lights on, but when we explained it was no big deal, they turned them off, and we all headed back toward the causeway underpass.

The winds continued to howl, but now at our back, the sea seemed almost playful as we finally made it to the treacherous bar at the fingers entrance just as the Q-beam died. Tying up and securing we shut off sea cocks, electricity and adjusted our mooring lines before breathing a sigh of relief.

It was finally over.

Sunday was the awards dinner, and we picked up our first place booty. Pretty anticlimactic though…..since we were the only sailboat (other than Southern Wave, and they were in the commercial category).

Someday, Port Isabel is going to dredge the treacherous bar and people will stop boycotting the Christmas Lighted Boat Parade and start participating again.

Tuesday I used the gift certificate to Boaters World to buy braided line for new jib sheets. Now it’s just a matter of taking off the decorations (which only takes about 1/10 as long to do as putting them on) and turning ‘Div back into a sailboat.

(The Port Isabel Chamber of Commerce summary of the event can be found here)